Big. Story.

As a coach, I usually get hired to help people with meaningful work—a career transition, leading a company, writing a book, taking a sabbatical, and all sorts of other worthy endeavors. Whatever the client’s goal, it’s important, to them and to me. And…it’s usually not the most important part of our work together. The same can be said for your life: The most important part may not be the part you’re focused upon; but we’ll come back to that in a minute.

Early on in a coaching relationship, I usually have the “Small Story - Big Story” conversation because it sets a wider perspective for our coaching agenda. And it also gives people an out, if that’s not what they’re looking for. Here’s how the conversation typically goes:

So Taylor, thanks for sharing this vision with me. Your plan to start a church sounds really exciting. I’m honored that you would want me to join you in this venture as a guide, an encourager, an objective voice. I can tell you that most pastors struggle to find a safe place to process the challenges and opportunities of being a spiritual leader, so I’m in.

I also want you to know that planting a church is the small story—a good and important story, but still the small one. The big story is who you are becoming while you plant and lead this church. Churches come and churches go. Pastors come and pastors go. But your journey to become your true self—the person God knows you to be—that is the journey of a lifetime, and that will last forever. So let’s work on both sides of thing together.

People usually get it and respond to that invitation…and this is the same invitation I’m extending to you right now. Perhaps you can already see the smaller stories that occupy your primary attention: your current work project, your family relationships, your hopes and plans for the future. Hobbies, schooling, finances, an engagement, community service—these are all deeply significant, but there is more! Can you see that God is using all these vital activities to shape you, refine you, and prepare you for the sacred task of being you?

Perhaps the biggest single hazard of our lives, you and me, is mistaking the small story for the big one…and letting all our energy, enthusiasm, and attention get consumed in those good stories, at the expense of the best one. Which means that the great quest in life is making space to give significant attention and engagement to the big story while remaining faithful to all the important small stories.

This is not easy. Being human isn’t easy. And it helps to have a spiritual coach or companion, officially or unofficially, on the journey with you. And it’s absolutely essential to be empowered and guided by The Coach: the Holy Spirit is the only One capable of helping us live out this sacred calling. The interplay between the small story and the big story is what we call life, and this is the great adventure.

ThriveTip

Take some time with God this week to ask him about the Big Story of your life—what parts of your soul are under construction right now, and how can you participate intentionally in cooperation with that. Ask God how keeping sight of the big story brings focus and clarity to the important small stories as well. A weekend retreat is a perfect setting for this exploration, but it can happen anywhere and anytime you’re ready to go there.

Takeaway

God is inviting you to co-write an amazing story with your life.